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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

This Teething Thing (sung to the tune of Billie Jean)

This thing is more like a bad scene
from a movie screen
I've said " Oh God, please have mercy"
more than just once
"How are we gonna sleep through the night?!"
He said "ha ha ha haaaaaaa..
Whoever said you're gonna sleep through the night?"


She started gettin her first tooth
and to tell the truth
don't even know what day it is now
is it still September?
How are we gonna sleep through the night??



Experience has told me when baby gets a tooth
Survival mode is your lifestyle now
And mamas out there tell me "Just pour yourself some rum
and rub it on her gums
then pray His Kingdom comes"


This teething thing is not fun ever
it's just a tooth that's breaking through baby's gums
but it's a tooth we might die from
just a tooth through the gums
but that tooth is like a gun

Evil Tooth

For four damn days and for four damn nights
 it's been quite a sight
But who can stand under these demands?!
 her teeth, God's plan
lolz, I thought we're gonna sleep through the night
So take my strong advice
don't assume that you've figured out life
you ain't right!!

I hold my baby, I nurse till 3
oh damn you teeth
The sound of my poor babe crying
Her cries sound like mine
I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die


Experience has told me "hey girl it's just a tooth
don't go around with a broken heart"
But I been wearin pj's for more than two whole days
my mind is in a daze
Yo God I need some grace


This teething shit is not fun ever
it's just a tooth that's breaking through baby's gums
but it's a tooth we might die from
just a tooth through the gums
but that tooth is like a gun





13 comments:

  1. Yay! I'm first! Did you ever try the Hyland's teething tablets? We've had luck with them, but I don't want to get your hopes up.

    "And mamas out there tell me "Just pour yourself some rum
    and rub it on her gums
    then pray His Kingdom comes"

    LOLS! Much needed.

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  2. And pour yourself some rum.
    To mitigate the gum.

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  3. Video. I demand a video. Ok, I'll politely request a video instead since demanding might be rude. We do have manners at the Casa... :)

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  4. Totally sung that aloud to myself....yea I''m cool like that.

    Love this. Feeling your pain over here. My husband sleeps in a different bed because the baby wakes up so often and my nipples are sore from an all night nurse-a-thon to sooth sore gums. ugh.

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  5. haha then pray his Kingdom comes! Love it! I'm right there with you. Need. More. Sleep! This was pretty amazing. I'm lucky to put words together that make sense in any of the posts I've had these last 7 months lol

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  6. I'm in the same place my friend. Your last picture made my day!

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  7. Baltic amber. For reals. And a little magical potion called Hosie Natural teething cheek balm. Miracle workers. And because I have no shame, you can find them both here www.elemeno-pee.com/jenny. Good luck, it wont last long. Until the next set anyway ;)

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  9. Try Camilia by Boiron. It is a homeopathic product for teething. No danger or harm or side effects with homeopathy. The directions are one every fifteen minutes up to three doses. I give one every three to five minutes up to 3 doses. At midnight or 3am or whatever ungodly hour it is I have no time or patience to wait and see if one dose is enough. I have had great luck with it on all three kids.

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  10. Your post brought back memories. I'm going to send a link to my daughter. Her 12-month-old son has eight teeth. I know she's hoping he's done for awhile....

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  11. Oh man, this made me laugh out loud with tears. I'm juust in the middle of teething and not being able to put the baby down and no sleep and run on sentences. Thanks for the comedic brilliance, Heather!

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